Language is such a powerful way for us to gain insights into what people are and aren’t saying, what they do and don’t believe, and how they feel or don’t feel. When you are attuned to the specific language that you, your team, or your clients are using, then you will truly understand how people’s minds work. In today’s episode, Chris talks about some words that are major red flags. Our words reflect our beliefs, and when we use disempowered language it is because we feel disempowered. So, by putting our words under a microscope and getting curious about what is fueling what we are saying, we can produce real change. You will not be able to change your language in one go, but personal growth junkies know that it is all about progress, not perfection. So, as you go forward, perk up those ears and listen to what you are telling yourself and others, and you will see just how much of a shift is possible with a few small tweaks.
Key Points From This Episode:
– Slow down and appreciate what you have because it might not be there forever.
– An example of weak language versus strong language.
– Unpacking exactly why language matters.
– Why ‘can’t’ is a major language red flag.
– Listen to the language that you use when you talk to yourself.
– Notice where ‘can’t’ comes up in your life and when you see the pattern, shift it.
– Hear why ‘try’ is another of Chris’s red flag words.
– There is a difference between trying and actually committing.
– The point of monitoring someone’s language with such scrutiny.
– ‘Should’ is a red flag word because it can evoke shame, which in turn causes a reaction.
– The word ‘but’ implies lack, and the absence of, so try to replace it with ‘and.’
– Things are not an either/or situation, and the word ‘but’ makes us believe there is only one truth.
– Bonus red flag sentence: ‘I don’t know’.
“For coaches particularly, I can’t imagine anything other than listening very deeply to people’s words and the language they choose.” — Chris Goodman [0:05:03]
“You’re always giving people permission to continue the language they’re choosing if you’re not addressing it.” — Chris Goodman [0:15:19]
“Remember, it’s a process. We’re seeking progress, not perfection.” — Chris Goodman [0:24:18]
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